How Are You Doing

"The human frame was never meant to carry the weight of the world". - Louie Giglio

If you've been in Christian radio for more than a minute, you know that this format is so much more than songs and streams and wires and running a tight board. There are people with real lives and real struggles involved.

So, this isn't really a "radio" article. It's more of a "people" article. I hope you'll understand.

As an on-air personality, it's my job to connect with my listeners. It's my job to gain (and keep) their trust. Over time, as that bridge of trust was built, and as I made the choice to pick up the phone when listeners called, I eventually had people on the line who feel like they connected with me on a deeper level. Instead of simply being the next prize-winner or song requestor, they'd start telling me a little about what they're going through. The recent death of a loved one. The abusive relationship they're trying to escape. The prodigal teenager that they're heartbroken over.

We'll hear them out, maybe use their audio, say a prayer, move on to the next call, and do it day after day after day.

There are a lot of very talented communicators in our business. People who can masterfully craft a story and get a thousand Compassion babies sponsored in a three-minute break. The tricky thing is that when we all got into radio, we developed our communication skills. Few of us had the forethought to take seminary or psychology classes to develop our 'how-on-earth-do-I-handle-all-of-this' skills.

The burdens we hear about are genuine, and I think we all have true intentions to care about the people who come to us for help; but maybe we don't have the skills or capacity to do so with the number of situations we encounter (and the things we're dealing with in our own lives).

Little by little, you-the on-air personality-give, and encourage, and empower, and rally around, and give some more, and absorb more hurt. Before you know it, you may find yourself in a spot where you need a little of that encouraging and empowering and soul-breathing yourself.

It is okay to need help. It is. If the engineers came into your studio tomorrow with a brand new board and automation system, I'm pretty sure you'd ask a few questions before launching into a live show. Allow yourself to ask for help with the heart stuff too. You carry a lot in your personal life and your professional life.

You weren't meant to do it by yourself.

Fight the voice that tells you that you have to be okay every minute of every day "because my listeners need me to be that way.' No. What your listeners need is for you to be authentic with your own struggles and equipped to help them with theirs. There are some situations and some heartaches that a Chris Tomlin song simply won't cover. There are times when you ask for a word from God, open your Bible, land on "Jesus wept," and think, "Well, that isn't exactly what I needed-now what?"

Allow yourself to ask for help if you need it, because your listeners, your co-workers, your family need you. As we know, there can be beauty in the broken, especially when you get that call that relates to the horrible situation that you once found yourself in and can say "Yeah. Me too."

If you are scared to take that first step, seriously, give me a call and I can describe to you the year I desperately needed help and was too proud to admit it. ...And my mom ended up making me an appointment to get some counsel (I was 35-fully capable of doing it myself-but also stubborn as a mule). I screamed at her for doing so and then I learned to love this woman named Julie, who saw me cry the ugliest of tears and gave me unlimited access to Diet Coke and M&Ms and never made me feel like a failure for needing her...

You'll end up wanting a Julie too.

And bosses: if you're reading this, may I challenge you to do more than walk by and ask, "Hey, how are you?", but find a way to make resources available to your team in the event that they need professional help? You've got relationships in your community. Use them. Having a healthy team is worth it.

You cannot carry it all by yourself. You weren't designed to. So don't. Get a little (or a lot) of help and you'll end up feeling a little less beat up and you'll be a lot more effective when it's time to give some assistance to the listeners who need you.