Why Is Everyone Staring At Me?

Ever have one of those times when it seems like everyone is giving you the stink eye?
Making you wonder just where & when you spilled soup on your shirt?
Or worse?

It happened to me recently.
Everything started innocently enough.
I took a lunch break, went to a great new "spicy" chicken establishment, and placed my order.
As I was waiting for the food to arrive, I began perusing the email box on my phone.
Reading, answering, filtering....I soon realized that the couple at the next table was looking at me.
Studying me fairly intently.
And I couldn't imagine why.

So I just kept on minding my own business, knocking out my work, waiting on my chicken.
But they kept looking over my way, interrupting their conversation to glance and stare.
I began to get more curious. And a little aggravated.
But I still didn't let on that I noticed.
I was far too busy, doing some far more important.
I soldiered on.

A minute or so later, the man stopped in mid-sentence and cocked his head in my direction.
I'd had about had enough of their rudeness.
Just about the time I was going to look over at him with an incredulous, "can I help you with something?", I realized that I was humming (my wife calls it "grunting") the bass line of the song that was playing in the background.
Suddenly, I realized why they had been casting so many disparaging looks in my direction.
And in an instant all those junior high stifled laughter exercises all came roaring back.
With a passion.

Now, I can tell a story with a straight face as good as the next guy.
Until my tickler gets to a certain point, that is.
Then all bets are off, and there is going to be some serious guffawing going on.
SOMEHOW, I held it in this time.
I may have some abdominal damage to worry about in the future, but for now I was in the clear.
Continuing to focus on my email, I graciously, smoothly and quickly faded out my dynamic bass accompaniment line.
Stopped bobbing my head to the beat.
And thankfully accepted my chicken and potatoes, which gave me something to stuff in my mouth.
I'm sure my two co-patrons were grateful.
They finished up their conversation, and left relatively quickly.

So...what did I learn thru this experience?
Several things.
First, since I tend to not notice when I do this (which my wife tells me is a LOT), I had not been "tuned in".
I had zoned out into my own little world, and my normally observant self had suffered an epic fail.
Second, these "nosy people" who were callously looking in my direction, weren't being inconsiderate at all.
I was disturbing THEM. Something that I really try NOT to do. Epic fail #2.
Third, once I realized what was really going on, I couldn't tell them I was sorry.
I'm afraid my ensuing laughter would have feigned my intended sincerity.
No apology. And they probably think I was doing it on purpose. Epic fail #3.

How does this apply to our everyday lives?
It's caused me to be reminded, once again, that we all have idiosyncrasies that we most likely aren't acutely aware of.
And that, most likely, there are times when we are oblivious to the way they bother other folks.
I'm going to try to be more aware of mine, as I practice an extra measure of grace for others.
Hopefully they will do the same for me.

So if you see a big fat guy in the checkout line at Kroger....
with his head nodding to the beat, and bass line booming.....
Be not dismayed.
He probably didn't just get off the short bus, and he's probably not going to do you any harm.
He's probably just marching to the beat of his own different drummer....or bass line, as it were.

His wife calls him "Bobbin Head Doll Man".
Bless his little heart.